People despise in others what they hate in themselves. This is especially true for Christians struggling with homosexuality. And although it’s certainly not true in every case, so many homophobic people end up being exposed as gay people themselves! Why is this? Why the secrecy? Why the double life and the double standards? It’s because as a whole, the Church has taught its people to loathe homosexuals. They make false claims about the “gay agenda” (if there is such a thing, let me know…because I’ve been missing out on the meetings). They also convince people that it is so perverted, so filthy, so unspeakable… that it is a subject unworthy of open discussion.
I’ve experienced this unbelievable phenomenon in my own life. The one who speaks anti-homosexual rhetoric in public is the one who sends me private text messages, telling me how hot they find someone (of the same sex). The one who preaches against the horrors of the gay lifestyle is caught the next week with their gay lover. The one who rants about how homosexuality is unnatural is the same girl who passionately kissed me 10 years ago. Can we see a pattern here?!
Confession time: It’s very difficult for me to not allow anger to consume me. However, I must remember that there was a time when I, myself, was so uncomfortable with my own sexuality that I would have done anything to deny it. Pointing out the sexuality of another takes the spotlight off of their own. If they quote enough Scripture and hold enough picket signs, then perhaps no one will notice that they are questioning their own sexuality.
And guess what? These people are hurting. They’ve been told what to believe, but their experiences teach them something else. They have questions. They have stories. They have a lot of self-hate… and they are silenced. They are silenced by the people they trust and by the church they love. So rather than confront their questions, they attempt to fit in by any means necessary. This could mean hypocrisy. This could mean judging others. But most significantly, it means a lot of hurting individuals.
It’s not just the out and proud LGBT community that is being hurt by the Church. It is the people just like the ones I’ve mentioned, who are sitting in congregations across the world every single week… and they hate themselves. They hate themselves because they’ve been told to.
I ask you… isn’t there a better way? Let’s encourage conversation and discussion within the Church walls.
Let’s do it for them.